By Brian G. Gilmartin
Shyness & Love covers the one significant learn carried out up to now on social nervousness sickness because it is manifested in casual, unstructured, male/female relationship and courtship occasions. It specializes in the motives of "love-shyness" and the implications for these troubled with it.
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Extra resources for Shyness & love : causes, consequences, and treatment
Environmental and learning-related factors have Love-Shyness and the Nature versus Nurture Debate 35 been carefully controlled by many different researchers. Yet no matter how carefully the various extraneous factors are controlled, male babies of the same very young age behave very differently from one another. And indeed the same applies to female babies of the same very young age. The important point is that these quite substantial differences in behavioural reactions have been observed in healthy, well-loved and cared for infants long before any differential learning could possibly have taken place.
The recommendations that are made in this book are to the maximum extent possible sensitive to the needs, wishes and very real human feelings of these men. Furthermore, this book contains no recommendations or pieces of advice that are out of harmony with what has been learned about the inborn, biologically based attributes of the love-shy. In fact, readers who are love-shy should feel heartened to learn that there are plenty of attractive female partners around who would be quite amenable to loving a love-shy man.
Many love-shys are aware of the rules, but their unadulterated romanticism disallows them from accepting such rules and acting upon them. Again, love-shy men value complete honesty. They want to remove the play-acting “mask” immediately, as soon as they find themselves engaged in Introduction 19 a conversation with a pretty girl. They crave and aspire to immediate acceptance and love as they are—no false “fronts” presented. Why This Book? Shy people tend to be very quiet. ” And it represents a key reason why they have been accorded very little attention by research scholars, by popular journalists and by people in general.